Arctic Monkeys - Fake Tales Of San Francisco

Fake Tales of San Francisco
Echo through the room
More point to a wedding disco
Without a bride or groom

There's a super cool band yeah
With their trilbies and their glasses of white wine
And all the weekend rock stars in the toilets
Practicing their lines

I don't want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you no
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you no
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you
I don't want to hear you

Fake Tales of San Francisco
Echo through the air
And there's a few bored faces in the back
All wishing they weren't there

And as the microphone squeaks
A young girl's telephone beeps
Yeah she's dashing for the exit
Oh, she's running to the streets outside
"Oh you've saved me," she screams down the line
"The band were fucking wank
And I'm not having a nice time"

I don't want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you no
(Kick me out, kick me out)
Yeah but his bird thinks it's amazing, though
So all that's left
Is the proof that love's not only blind but deaf

He talks of San Francisco, he's from Hunter's Bar
I don't quite know the distance
But I'm sure that's far
Yeah, I'm sure that's pretty far

Yeah, I'd love to tell you all my problem
You're not from New York City, you're from Rotherham
So get off the bandwagon, and put down the handbook
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[x4]
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook

Teddy Picker - Arctic Monkeys

They've sped up to the point where they provoke
The punchline before they have told the joke
Plenty of desperation to be seen
Staring at the television screen

They've sped up to the point where they provoke
You to tell the f**king punchline before you have told the joke
Sorry sunshine it doesn't exist
It wasn't in the top 100 list

And it's the thousandth time that it's even bolder,
Don't be surprised when you get bent over,
They told ya,but you were dying for it

She saw it and she grabbed it and it wasn't what it seemed
The kids all dream of making it, whatever that means
Another variation on a theme
A tangle on the television and the magazine
D'you reckon that they do it for a joke?
D'you reckon that they make 'em take an oath?
That says "we are defenders
Of any poseur or professional pretender around"

When did your list replace the twist and turn
like a fist replaced a kiss, don't concernus with your bollocks
I don't want your prayers
Save it for the morning after

And it's the thousandth time and it's even bolder,
Don't be surprised when you get bent over,
They told ya, but you were gagging for it

Lets have a game on the Teddy Picker
Not quick enough can I have it quicker?
Already thick and you're getting thicker
Lets have a game on the Teddy Picker
Not quick enough can I have it quicker?
Already thick and you're getting thicker

Assuming that all things are equal,
Who'd want to be men of the people
When there's people like you?

Matador - Arctic Monkeys

She was marrying a matador and he was with the weather girl,
A very clever girl who stood out amongst several once
A terrible dilemma and forever he’ll regret this day he didn’t make the
Rescue from the building
Sulking won’t get you nowhere son,
There’s blood on your chin where you’ve bitten your tongue
Smitten but might not be smitten for long if you’re still sitting she’ll soon
Be smitten and gone

Old Yellow Bricks - Arctic Monkeys

Old yellow bricks,
Love's a risk,
Quite the little Escapoligist
Looked so miffed,
When you wished,
For a thousand places better than this,

You are the fugitive,
But you dont know what you're runnin from,
You cant kid us,
And you couldnt trick anyone,
Houdini, love you dont know what you're runnin away from,

Who wants to sleep in the city that never wakes up?
Blinded by nostalgia,
Who wants to sleep in the city that never wakes up?

She wasnt raised by the way,
That the emperor put traps in the cage,
And the days she being dull,
Lead to nights readin beer bottles,

You're such a fugitive,
But you dont know what you're runnin from,
You cant kid us,
And you couldnt trick anyone,
Houdini, love you dont know what you're runnin away from,

Who wants to sleep in the city that never wakes up?
Blinded by nostalgia,
Who wants to sleep in a city that never wakes up?

You're at a loss,
Just because,
It wasnt all that you thought it was,

You are a fugitive but you dont know what you're runnin away from,

She said I want to sleep in the city that never wakes up,
And revel in nostalgia,
I know I said he wants to sleep in the city that never wakes up but,
Dorothy was right though

Arctic Monkeys - Fluorescent Adolescent

You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress
Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness
You landed in a very common crisis
Everything's in order in a black hole
Nothing seems as pretty as the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking her Tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?

Oh the boys a slag
The best you ever had
The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Not as daft as they seem
Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up

Flicking through a little book of sex tips
Remember when the boys were all electric?
Now when she tells she's gonna get it
I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget it
Clinging to not getting sentimental
Said she wasn't going but she went still
Likes her gentlemen not to be gentle
Was it a Mecca Dabber or a betting pencil?

Oh the boys a slag
The best you ever had

The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Not as daft as they seem
Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up

Oh where did you go?
Where did you go?
Where did you go? Whoa...

You're falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane
You just sounded it out
you're not coming back again

You're falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane
You just sounded it out
you're not coming back again

You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress
Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness
You landed in a very common crisis
Everything's in order in a black hole
Nothing seems as pretty as the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking her Tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?

Arctic Monkeys - Leave Before The Lights Come On

Well this is a good idea,
He wouldn't do it if it wasn't,
He wouldn't do it if it wasn't one.
Well my friend fancies you,
Oh what a way to begin it all,
You said it's always exciting words to hear

And we woke up together not quite realising how,
Oh when your stretching and yawning,
Its always hard in the morning,

And I suppose that's the price you pay,
Oh it isn't what it was,
She's thinking he looks different today,
And oh there's nothing left to guess now,

You left before the lights came on,
Because you didn't want to ruin,
All the lust that was brewing,
Before he absolutely had to,
And how can you wake up,
With someone you don't love?
And not feel slightly fazed by it,
Oh, he had a struggle,

And you woke up together not quite realising how,
Oh but he's stretching and yawning,
It's always hard in the morning,

And I suppose that's the price you pay,
Oh it isn't what it was,
She's thinking he looks different today,
And oh there's nothing left to guess now,

Quick, let's leave, before the lights come on,
'Cos then you don't have to see,
'Cos then you don't have to see,
What you've done,

Quick, let's leave, before the lights come on,
'Cos then you don't have to see,
'Cos then you don't have to see,
What you've done,

Until tomorrow comes,

I'll walk you up, what time's the bus come?
I'll walk you up, what time's the bus come?
I'll walk you up, what time's the bus come?
I'll walk you up, what time's the bus come?

Brianstorm - Arctic Monkeys

Brian
Top marks for not trying
So I'd like you to bless us with your effortlessness
We'd wait for and so trained and comforted

And I wonder
Are you putting us under
'Cos we can't take our eyes off his t-shirt
And ties combination

Well see ya later Innovator!

Some want to kiss some want to kick you
There's not a net you couldn't slip through
Or at least that's the impression I get
'Cos you're smooth and you're wet
And she's not aware yet, but she's yours

She'll be sayin' "Use me"
Show me the Jacuzzi
I imagine that it's there on a plate
you're our rendevouz rate
Means you'll never be frightnened
To make em wait for a while
I doubt it's your style
Not to get what you set
Out to acquire

The eyes are on fire
You are the un-forcasted storm

Calm, Collected and Commanding
(Top marks for not trying)
You hit the other story standing
With your ambitions and jokes
I bet there's hundreds of blokes
That have wept 'cos you've stolen their...

Thunder
Are you putting us under
'Cos we can't take our eyes of his t-shirt
and ties combination

Well see ya later
Innovator